1 Crawling With Zombies Gerry Conway & Paulo Henrique

Night of the living Hardy Boys?!

Archive

gellaho
Well, my pupils are still the size of dimes, so we shall pivot for The Book Cage. A return to The Hardy Boys: The New Casefiles: Undercover Brothers with Issue #1 Crawling With Zombies.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Sorry your eyes are dilated tho.
gellaho
Instead of a preview, you shall reckon with the fact that there was a second Hardy Boys Manga being published at the same time
gellaho
Kids love the exposed muscles on Frank
gellaho
And the exposed brain
FancyShark
Do you really need to go undercover when dealing with zombies?
Juho
Yes. They're gonna eat you.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
I mean it worked in Shaun of the Dead.
LyraV
I'd like to think even my zombie corpse would zone in on the Hardy Boys for destruction.
gellaho
Still amazed by how bad this logo is
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Zombies can smell a Hardy ffrom over a kilometer away.
gellaho
Put two stars in between American and Crime, sure
FancyShark
They couldn't even center the text
gellaho
FancyShark
LENS FLARE
gellaho
You don't say
FancyShark
What a completely natural way to talk to someone
gellaho
FancyShark
"Man, that was nuts, huh?"
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"Huh that sounds like a cool story."
"Oh no of course its not going to happen on the page, what do you take us for? Writers?"
LyraV
All Tarantulas Annihilate Canada ⭐⭐
gellaho
No clue
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFeDzVwGbZg
Their theme song.
FancyShark
I, too, like to give the complete backstory on someone attacking me before acknowledging them
Never listen to me play a video game
gellaho
What is happening here
FancyShark
The mountain, she bleeds with the blood of the earth
LyraV
Is someone shooting a laser?
FancyShark
That's some serious air for such a shallow hill
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Its like someone tried to draw a comic visual effect but only had it described to them and the printer fucked it up further.
gellaho
The Silicon Valley has one security system
gellaho
And those stadium lights have scoliosis
FancyShark
In media res works better if you don't have the characters discussing the leadup like bad improv
gellaho
Joe is such a catty bitch
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Joe is bitching an awful lot for a man in a sweet dirtbike chase\gunfight.
FancyShark
That's right, 90's and 2000's teens. Joe went there.
gellaho
Frank's eyebrow appears to be escaping his helmet
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Hahahaha he's in VR and equipped a helmet not meant for his character.
FancyShark
It looks like he's about to drink from a sippy cup
LyraV
Yelling at the top of his lungs.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
The gunmen chasing them on dirtbikes can totally hear them but are pretending they cant to be polite.
gellaho
Two full spreads already
FancyShark
SKUUUUUSSSHHH
gellaho
In case you can't read the whole thing, that's SKUUUSSSSHHH(?)SKUUUSSSSHHHH
FancyShark
That's the sound their pelvises just made
hahahaha, the idiot criminals didn't have eye protection
gellaho
Still not sure what's happening here
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
My best friends brother once peeled the skin off his hand bones in a dirtbike accident, and I would love for this manga to have that happen to Frank or Joe.
FancyShark
Go to the dirt bike rally on Hardy Days and you might catch a bullet to take home!
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Just for six months they have their fingers sewn together as the skin grafts take.
gellaho
Bipolar Joe goes from horny to angry
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Reaching for things with their new fleshy flipper hand.
gellaho
Younger Hardy Boy Brother
FancyShark
This dude is having the greatest moment of his life
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
I mean he did just witness a sick dirtbike chase\gunfight.
1000 Space GDCs
does that girl's shirt have a boob window
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Of course it does. Manga.
gellaho
Those radical moves aren't part of some kind of boy detectiving, are they?
1000 Space GDCs
Is ATAC some kind of underground vigilante thing? Do the cops not know about it?
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Officer Sean Doesntreadthenews.
Of the Dublin Doesntreadthenewses.
gellaho
Oh, I forgot how fucked up they drew Fenton
Proxy Caught On Camera
"Can you see anything up my nose, officer?"
FancyShark
Just endless darkness in Frank's mouth
oh right, Fenton's got a thruple going
1000 Space GDCs
1000 Space GDCs
gellaho
Jesus Christ, someone make an emergency call to the art school
FancyShark
They didn't even manga right!
gellaho
Not to be crude, but this tit situation is critical
FancyShark
She has no ribs. Only titty
gellaho
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Man Aunt Trudy's tits are some of the weirdest I've seen in a manga, like the artist didnt understand titty art fundamentals like perspective.
FancyShark
That's hard to do in manga!
gellaho
Two pages ago
1000 Space GDCs
Seems like a foundational manga thing
LyraV
Agreed!
gellaho
The artist has one look idea
FancyShark
A look that says "One of us has to give up a limb so we can eat"
Ramb$ne Gracie
Please tell me a computer explodes
:brunchghost:
gellaho
Good lord
gellaho
Why does mom have a middle schooler's hair clip
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Because her and her sister both look like college girls trying to seem younger.
LyraV
Has anyone pointed out the Z Box? I hate it
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
They have a joint Trapper Keeper full of Lisa Frank stickers.
gellaho
Art
FancyShark
The aunt's standing profile but her ass is trying to see what's going on
1000 Space GDCs
The artist was on a deadline and had to trace a lot of stuff from their How To Draw Manga book.
gellaho
This seems highly inefficient
gellaho
But at least I know that's hdmi, very helpful
1000 Space GDCs
ATAC is into some real mission impossible shit i guess
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
What a fucking hassle making fucking Nintendo cartridges for these two dinguses to get orders.
Like the manufacturing alone.
gellaho
A bird seems to have shit in Frank's hair
FancyShark
Making a lot of assumptions about how your employer acts
gellaho
Hello, teens, have you heard of these "Flashed Mobs"
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
just got here and why do the hardy boys look like anime charlie kirk?
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
The Xbox had an internet connection, you could download patches and shit, you do not need to manufacture and burn discs to send orders to your teen vigilantes.
gellaho
This zombie forgot his line
1000 Space GDCs
"Hardys, as you know, teen socialize in public"
FancyShark
Is it harmless fun? I could see a lot of teens getting murdered over that
gellaho
Yeah, I'm sure she's fine
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Method acting, probably.
FancyShark
She needed to be compelled, because teens in flash mobs are known for their adherence to traffic safety
LyraV
This truck driving through the concept of time.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Or Cambodian devil shrooms.
Teens love method acting and shrooms.
gellaho
Frank is de-aging
FancyShark
Frank's face distorts like a water bed
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"online social net" fuck you.
Just say IRC and forums, you dorks.
gellaho
And Joe's hair is growing at an alarming rate
gellaho
Gotta wonder what the two controllers are for
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
...are they getting instructions on their fucking xbox?
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
yes.
FancyShark
Who the fuck is Belinda? Is she a Cassie?
1000 Space GDCs
His neckline is also plunging dramatically
"This xbox will self destruct in 5 seconds"
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I also always refer to my s/o by their full name in case I'm spontaneously used for exposition in a children's mystery book
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Is ATAC gonna have these nerds investigate rainbow parties too?
gellaho
Chet apparently lives an hour away
FancyShark
"Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to look into this so-called 'race music'"
CHET!
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
I am now imagining Joe and Frank trying to angle an invitation to a teen blowjob party and its funny as shit.
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
is...he wearing a leather jacket over a hoodie?
gellaho
1000 Space GDCs
Cassie hopes she can hold her breath long enough to get out of Chet's bedroom.
FancyShark
There is no way he only got "about 100" results for searching "zombie" on the internet
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
It was the style at the time.
FancyShark
ahhh, all is right now. Thank you
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
the style at the time was boiling to death in your own juices, apparently
gellaho
Line?
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I guess that's why it's called "drip"
Agent of Fortune
I know the ATAC logo is supposed to be a sheriff's star but it looks like A star of David
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
oh god he's having a stroke
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"Bro, do you smell toast?"
gellaho
Belinda, that page hasn't finished loading
Agent of Fortune
"Social networking" is not something Joe and Frank have heard of?
FancyShark
I feel assaulted by that dialogue
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"Tee hee, I have like six thousand followers on my Insta, where I do ASMR."
Agent of Fortune
Tweester
1000 Space GDCs
This small town has a whole row of museums?
gellaho
When "Got Your Nose" goes wrong
LyraV
What expression were those eyebrows meant to denote?
FancyShark
According to a hashtag, the crawl is scheduled for tonight
Agent of Fortune
This is Marvel Mangaverse level art
FancyShark
:FuckApe:
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
this is the author's elaborate suicide note isn't it
gellaho
Nice tits, Chet
FancyShark
Ah, good. They're in hell
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Shit, VOLCANO!
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I hate this art so much
Agent of Fortune
Wait
gellaho
Might as well happen in every one of these
Agent of Fortune
They got Gerry Conway to write this?
FancyShark
They get that this art is supposed to convey extreme emotions, but they're not getting that the emotions being written are bland
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I don't remember the hardy boys being this abrasive towards each other in previous incarnations
1000 Space GDCs
Their nose and jawline makes them look like muppets
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
This is manga so it has to be edgier.
Agent of Fortune
They were like, let's get someone who was born in the fifties to write this book For the Kids?
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I think it's more like "I've watched one episode of Inuyasha, I know how to write manga style"
gellaho
#zombie-crawl hash-tag message
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Belinda be hornyyyyy
Agent of Fortune
Gerry Conway is the guy that killed Gwen Stacy
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
the artist cannot decide how belinda's hair is tied can they
gellaho
A rectangle
FancyShark
Really getting the most out of the medium
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
All Belinda wants him to find is her g-spot, but thats the one thing a Hardy boy can't find.
FancyShark
And this is manga. The g-spot is, like, everywhere
gellaho
Thanks for telling me it's dusk when they're outside
1000 Space GDCs
"sigh That's my bellybutton again, Joe."
Agent of Fortune
OH SHIT
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Frank and Joe spend an afternoon asking people where they can find this mysterious "little man in a canoe" down by the riverside.
FancyShark
HOLY SHIT
Agent of Fortune
THE UNIFIED THEORY OF HOT DOG
gellaho
Chet is part gorilla
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
the hotdogverse is real!
1000 Space GDCs
This lady has horse legs
FancyShark
Was he the original artist?!
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
that mask is almost certainly a reference to something but fuck if I know what it is
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Horse Legged Zombie Woman is my ska rythmic metal band.
Ozzie
If I was going to be a generous person, I'd guess Cryptkeeper.
gellaho
Just incomprehensible
gellaho
OH.
Ozzie
Chet knows this from Addams Family reruns
FancyShark
And from how much goth puss he's crushed
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
the letter just could not be arsed, could they
Agent of Fortune
He did the cover!
FancyShark
He got better! Good for him!
gellaho
Meanwhile: chemicals
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
"TWEESTER"?!
FancyShark
I can't read "Tweester" without hearing it said in Ren Hoek's voice
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
STIMPY! YOU EEEEEDIOT!
gellaho
Arms out is the most efficient running posture
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
"The kids like Naruto right?"
gellaho
Every high school has the steam engine room
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Whats fucked up to me is they used Twitter already earlier, but someone must have said "No, once is risky enough. Change it to Tweester."
FancyShark
Mousey girl can move
gellaho
Meanwhile, Joe and Chet get dosed
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Ah the classic high school boiler room. Where you have an equal chance to make out or get murdered by a pedophile.
1000 Space GDCs
I could move pretty quick too if joe hardy burst into my home and started chasing me
FancyShark
okay, good point
That activates the adrenaline fierce
gellaho
Threats on tippy toes
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
I can't shake how the hardy boys look like kid ryu and ken in this style
gellaho
This school is falling apart
FancyShark
She must have expressed opinions about video games. I can't otherwise explain why geeks would be cruel to someone that looks like her
gellaho
Really falling apart
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Yeah I mean I get it, mousey girl, but like......No, yeah. On your side here, miss.
gellaho
Hey there, gun
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Just next time use a molotov and not mind altering chemicals.
FancyShark
Way more detail on the gun than anything else
gellaho
PTOW
FancyShark
From the desk of George Ptow
1000 Space GDCs
Next time just sell your drug to a pharmaceutical company. It's way easier to get revenge on jocks when you're rich.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Um.........mousey girl..........you invented a DRUG?!
If you arent popular its your own fault.
gellaho
She died as she lived. Whining
FancyShark
Frank: Not a doctor
gellaho
Brilliant idea Frank, just get right in there
FancyShark
Jesus, Frank. Why don't you roll around in it for good measure?
gellaho
And rub your hands with, uh
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"slurpslurpslurp. This taste.........where do I remember it from?"
gellaho
FancyShark
Hey! It IS a sex thing!
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
I mean Taylor should just have made sex meth and people would be cheering for her now.
gellaho
No hands!
1000 Space GDCs
I'm glad they don't go too far into the implications of a drug that removes willpower that can be absorbed by the skin
Brendan
I'm not really here. My book party is me, packing my books.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Instead shes died a creamy death in a school boiler room.
Brendan
But pretend I am and tell me what's up.
GAH it's a comic
1000 Space GDCs
Not just a comic, a manga!
gellaho
He's immortal, Frank
Agent of Fortune
Your favorite thing!
FancyShark
Gellaho's eyes are hollowed out right now, so we're reading Hardy Boys manga
We're reading about them investigating a flash mob that pretends to be zombies. An unpopular nerd girl was just killed for making a brain chemical gas
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
brain chemical gas CREAM
gellaho
NUNHH
NUNUUHU
UUUHHHH
UHHHN
UH
HUH
HNH
UUH
UUH
NNUH
UN
UUNNUHHH
NNNUUUHH
UNNHH
UNNNN
UNNHU
Brendan
Ah well then, we await the return of The Master.
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
This is the worst way to rob a museum.
FancyShark
They're surrounded by people who didn't have anything prepared
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
And robbing museums is a bad idea anyway unless you are repatriating stolen artifacts.
gellaho
NGRGAAABBYHH
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Shit, Joe and Chet are having full on trips, how was mousey girl not popular as balls?!
gellaho
Someth fun for the kids
FancyShark
Fucking sweet
gellaho
It seems really pleasant with all the screaming and death
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Fear and Loathing in Bayport.
FancyShark
Again, 400% more detail on the gun than anything else
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
I mean if she can make some face cream that makes you see demons she can make E.
gellaho
Not sure why they're listening to these guys
alfredo disco jakesy (69)
Oh shit Hardy boys comics
FancyShark
I just realized that the artist has been drawing everything as normal American comic style except the faces
gellaho
Joe somehow teleports from the front of that crowd to the back
gellaho
It's the Brazilian way
LyraV
This three foot deep puddle.
Ozzie
The way this artist drew Joe's back, I thought it was his ass falling out.
I've got hunkbrain after today I guess.
gellaho
Shook all the features off this guy
FancyShark
The after-hunks take a while to wear off
Ozzie
Have you seen any panels that say Rardy Boys yet?
FancyShark
She is PISSED at his neck
gellaho
Good thing it never rains in Bayport
gellaho
Otherwise this plan would be stupid
1000 Space GDCs
Group Rinse sounds like it has a terrifying urban dictionary entry
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
This isnt the first time Chet has woken from a fugue state drenched.
FancyShark
And surrounded by people in weird outfits
gellaho
Joe has entered attack mode. Which breaks all his bones
LyraV
I'd believe that.
FancyShark
Curb-stomp to the base of the skull is at least closer to manga
1000 Space GDCs
That person Joe kicked will be breathing through a tube for the rest of their life
gellaho
This bus defies physics
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Wait is that bust supposed to be made of gold?
FancyShark
Or chocolate in gold foil
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Cos I think it would have shattered Belindas wrists.
gellaho
Paulo, I'd appreciate it if you could not draw faces like this for the children
Last Chance to Beat the Javo
FancyShark
Not since Nala in The Lion King has a cartoon so clearly communicated "fuck me" eyes
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Belinda is thirsty af.
gellaho
Fenton's about to beat some ass
FancyShark
Fenton "The Name's Ash" Hardy
Agent of Fortune
New emoji!
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
gellaho
They activated the light show in Fenton's study
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
This is the face of a man who's loosening his belt listening to his sons gibberish.
1000 Space GDCs
Why is his face drawn in such a different style from his sons?
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
edm intensifies.
gellaho
Looks like Maddie C made it all the way to the editor's note
LyraV
A question I'm sure he asked himself often while staring at the annoyingly inquisitive mailman.
gellaho
Joe's hair is strange and unknowable
FancyShark
Every anime character eventually reaches the Cloud Strife singularity
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Oh I do not like the phrasing of "brothers and partners"
gellaho
They've entered the faceless realm
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
"Aaaagh! REALITY! FOLDING! FACE..........DISAPPEARING!"
alfredo disco jakesy (69)
Assless realm too apparently
FancyShark
She's at half-donk, out of respect for the nerd girl
gellaho
The End
gellaho
And now some notes from the editor
Looks like they got the perfect guy
FancyShark
There was no editor
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
NO. You dont "break up" with your brother, you just stop talking to him until one of your parents dies and get in a fistfight at the funeral.
gellaho
Except they didn't kill Joe's girlfriend in this one, so
FancyShark
cowards
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
To be fair, he was explicit. Belinda isnt his girlfriend.
She just wishes she was.
Like maybe more than is really plausible.
Chet is right there.
FancyShark
Chet would ruin her for other men
gellaho
Jesus, this Nancy Drew preview looks awful
FancyShark
hahaha, I forgot about the horrible Nancy Drew previews
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Hahahaha this asshole looks like someone being sarcastic about furries.
LyraV
the fuck is going there?!
gellaho
1000 Space GDCs
It looks like someone had their photoshop layers in the wrong order
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
The popcorn better be a diegetic way to hide a dick.
Or theres no excuse for this.
FancyShark
It looks like the art you try to ignore at a struggling cafe
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
It looks like art made to make fun of millenials by someone who doesnt really understand art or millenials well enough to make fun.
gellaho
You know that other Manga series? I found a collection of those for like $1 for the next occasion
I would describe it as unacceptably horny
FancyShark
I can't wait
gellaho
But that's for the future
Ferroday, Sororitas Ridiculous
frank's hair looks like he's taking a really long time to turn super saiyan
unless that's joe
the blond one
FancyShark
That's Joe, but you're right
1000 Space GDCs
Frank's gone full tuxedo mask on that cover
Agent of Fortune
That's a GREAT title
Oh hey
Scott Lobdell
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
The guy standing behind Frank looks like a personal trainer wearing a cape.
Wearing a crop top and low rise pants.
FancyShark
I think that's a lady
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
Might be?
It's manga so its hard to tell sometimes when it comes to shadowy figures.
Could be M. Bison in his summer outfit.
FancyShark
True
Horse Boxing Flippant Sausage
For the beach arc.
FancyShark
@gellaho , how you feeling? We calling it here?
gellaho
Oh, yeah we're done. This concludes this abbreviated edition of the Book Cage
Agent of Fortune
I'm frankly shocked anyone involved with Brazilian Mega Man got respectable work
FancyShark
Thank you again, gellaho!
Great riffing, everybody!
gellaho
Sleep well
FancyShark
GAAAHH
LyraV
NIghtmares!
Ozzie
Just traced straight from the cover of How to Draw Manga
gellaho
Ah, I found what I was looking for
FancyShark
That barracuda has nice boobs
gellaho
Illustrative of unacceptably horny
Agent of Fortune
How to Draw Manga The Brazilian Way
Last Chance to Beat the Javo
FancyShark
:fentonmanga: :frankmanga:
Have a great night, everyone!
1000 Space GDCs
Good riffing, everyone.
gellaho
I should also note that, with that, I think we've read every (or both) of The Hardy Boys: The New Casefiles: Undercover Brothers, outside of the single crossover with Nancy Drew