I still love how that "it's a cyborg" line is supposed to be a shocking development as though they could only cyborg one dude
This feels like it's going for drama and tension that is wildly unearned at this point
Also what are the odds on evil cyborg killing raven?
sensitive New Age jakesy
Oh shit gambling time
There should be a pool for who the first character to die will be
Is Ice still alive? If he is I can’t imagine it’ll be for much longer
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Where did we leave off? Mob boss was let go and Steele is with the girl? I forget names.
sensitive New Age jakesy
Yeah last I remember Borodini is on the loose but I forget if some of the side characters are still alive
I still have money that he becomes robo-Borodini at some point
Greg Danang Danar Dono
And the mannequin on the cover is his old partner as an evil cyborg?
sensitive New Age jakesy
It would seem that way based on the teaser
But in the world of Steele it’s not always super clear
Greg Danang Danar Dono
My bets are
Girlfriend - killed by evil mannequin
Evil robo partner- killed, not redeemed
Borodini - shows up in last chapter to set up next book
Discussion of Steeles dick - Yes
sensitive New Age jakesy
That’s a solid parlay right there
Steele for sure fucks. It would be an upset if he didn’t
gellaho
If Steele doesn't fuck that would be a first
sensitive New Age jakesy
Betting on Steele not fucking is like betting on Green in roulette
Science God Q Alchemy
The fact that it's his partner is clearly going for some kind of pathos, but his partner was barely mentioned so I don't care
Alpha Scientist Javo
Its like voting on purple in roulette
Science God Q Alchemy
I think steele should get his dick shot off, it's had more screen time and we're all much more invested in it's arc
gellaho
I skipped most of the stuff with the partner because it was boring. He mostly existed so Steele had someone to talk about his wife cheating on him and so he could explain why they were meeting with Ice
One of many characters that existed solely for exposition
Science God Q Alchemy
Now he has exists to kill steele
Wirebiter (he/him)
I too am interested in the arc of Steele’s dick
Science God Q Alchemy
If Steele's dick doesn't get shot off I'll be so disapointed
It will be the ultimate dramatic turn for the character
gellaho
I don't know if JD could part with that
He keeps talking about his ability to have children, he's gotta impregnate someone before he loses that dick
Greg Danang Danar Dono
I think JD is too insecure to ever shoot the dick off the character he projects himself into
Science God Q Alchemy
I mean, were assuming normal writing rules where things like forshadowing and chekovs gun apply and I just don't think he masters, genius, is that kind of writer.
I think the man whose real actual legal name is simon hawke, a name he deliberately chose, is going to be that predictable
Or you know, good
gellaho
Steele begins soon. If you need a refresher on the setting you can find it here: http://www.gellaho.com/books/steele
If you want Steele faces for your own personal use, you can find them here: http://www.gellaho.com/images
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Thanks, I do want Steele faces for my own personal use
Ye Olde Albany Blood Knife
If you don’t use them they use you, choose carefully
Science God Q Alchemy
I need some people to do steele face profile pics with me, ideally we have one of each
Why? I don't know.
gellaho
There have been many great opening lines in the history of literature
gellaho
Who had immediate Steele dick?
Everybody's naked!
gellaho
What a strong female character
In case you were wondering about Steele's construction, his eyes, brain, skeleton and most of his skin has been replaced
gellaho
But he still has some internal organs for some reason
So much dick talk already
Wirebiter (he/him)
This obsession on Steele’s dong being real is so wild to me
Science God Q Alchemy
God such an amazing mastery of the craft
Wirebiter (he/him)
None of the armor piercing bullets that tore him to shreds winged his ding-a-ling?
gellaho
They can send messages to Steele's brain directly now. And they sound like screams
gellaho
It was quite lucky
sensitive New Age jakesy
Damn all the bets on No Fuck Green have already been lost
Science God Q Alchemy
I bet it's not even his real dick
I bet it's just some guys
gellaho
It will always be funny to me how lazy this is
Somehow, fuck you expect me to write how that happened?
sensitive New Age jakesy
Lol
Wirebiter (he/him)
These things just happen, somehow
Science God Q Alchemy
I think it's great how immediately he went into Steele's real dick.
sensitive New Age jakesy
Somehow the terrorists got the shit to advance the plot!
Science God Q Alchemy
And ass apparently
His face ass and balls are all that make him human now
Wirebiter (he/him)
This guy got robocop’d into just a pelvis and face
gellaho
Raven explored his body quite thoroughly, I wonder if that means she pegged him
Wirebiter (he/him)
I think we can call that canon
Science God Q Alchemy
Do you think he cried when she stuck it in?
I feel like he would
gellaho
Great maximum security at the building that houses the CIA, Congress and the President
Wirebiter (he/him)
One of my biggest peeves is “what seemed to be” like fucking is it??
They should probably get that pile of marines cleaned up before guests come over
gellaho
gasp
gellaho
FATALITY
gellaho
Seems like they made this one a lot stronger
Science God Q Alchemy
I mean, good call making an unstoppable murder robot.
See this one didn't have a human penis and so he went insane.
gellaho
fatal mistake
I feel like you're asking for trouble with this name
gellaho
Ol' JD/Simon can't resist a cliché
Science God Q Alchemy
Wait, so these are cyborgs
Doesn't that mean they need like, a ton of human bodies to make them?
Were gonna need a lot more cops shot to death in the face and organs but not the dick
gellaho
I'm guessing JD didn't think through
He was too busy writing this kind of gold
Really uncharted territory
Greg Danang Danar Dono
This is the type of important detail that gets chopped for a better description of Steele's functioning genitals
gellaho
This is a great way to go about creating unstoppable murder machines. Keep information to yourself
I don't know if this guy understands how long 20 seconds is
Greg Danang Danar Dono
They act like the cyborgs are invincible murder machines but do we have any details?
Like is he explodeproof?
Or fireproof?
Science God Q Alchemy
They wanted to build an unstoppable army of cyborgs are, are they the bad guys?
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Armor piercing bullet sniper proof?
gellaho
I guess we're getting future weapons in the post apocalypse
sensitive New Age jakesy
Love the “I can’t tell you but trust me”
Greg Danang Danar Dono
And is Steele still a cop? Do cops get called in to take down rogue military agents?
sensitive New Age jakesy
Oh shit, he’s about to give him head
Science God Q Alchemy
Steele is whatever the story needs him to be
gellaho
Really seems like they haven't missed a beat, despite the billions dead
Science God Q Alchemy
These books are a sloppy pile of cliches and bad ideas, written by some kind of maniac
gellaho
Okay, so over half the CIA is dead
Also, they're talking about budgets?
Are they still printing money?
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Sometimes I think the author didn't fully think through the societal implications of billions dead / zombie apocalypse
gellaho
They're also worried about media attention
I can't get over that he thinks television would survive this
Greg Danang Danar Dono
At least they will get help from the strike force
sensitive New Age jakesy
Lol
What will the networks think?
Science God Q Alchemy
Good
gellaho
Yeah he was completely engulfed in flame after an explosion, but he survived that
sensitive New Age jakesy
Hahaha what part of him were they able to keep alive?
Science God Q Alchemy
"he died in that ambush" like fucking so did you dick
sensitive New Age jakesy
“Guys we saved the dick, we can work with this!”
Science God Q Alchemy
They can cyberize people, keep up.
gellaho
I think he hurt Steele's feelings
Science God Q Alchemy
God it's almost like making an unstoppable killer cyborg was a bad idea
Did they not add an emergency shutdown?
gellaho
That "You didn't have to" is so passive aggressive
Science God Q Alchemy
"god, steele, can you not be such a little birch about this?"
Perpetually Shocked Fay
That breezy
dialog is best read in Ryan George’s voice from those pitch meetings.
Science God Q Alchemy
Also, why is he having more of existential crisis about his partner being a cyborg than he did for him?
gellaho
Steele's ex-wife is back
Science God Q Alchemy
Full body search?
What did that entail?
sensitive New Age jakesy
And on top of all this, my god dam wife wants alimony
Science God Q Alchemy
That feel when your ex wife is hanging out with your new 18 year old girlfriend
gellaho
The director Higgins is a great guy
Science God Q Alchemy
Wait, did they copy Steele's brain?
Is the stalker steele?
Greg Danang Danar Dono
I thought Steele had a meat brain
Science God Q Alchemy
No he has a cyber brain
gellaho
Yes
But it's hilariously just sitting in the Texas Psyciatrist's apartment
I think it also had the exact same dreams Steele did in the last book, which doesn't make any sense
Science God Q Alchemy
Are they going to kill steele and bring him back with the copy?
gellaho
I'm not sure what character I'm supposed to like in these books
Science God Q Alchemy
They where memories put in to fill out memory gaps so I think it makes sense.
I don't know these are so badly written.
Ferroday, ScapeApe
why is it so important for the engram to have steele's voice if it will still provide the same info?
Science God Q Alchemy
I also disagree with the premise that Steele's brain would respond identically to robot steele, if he's in a different set if circumstances. They'll grow further and further apart until they're basically two different people
Ferroday, ScapeApe
you're assuming steele is capable of character growth
sensitive New Age jakesy
All that damn red tape keeping copies of his super brain out of any idiots hands
gellaho
The Texan Psychiatrist who took the copy of Steele's brain is now lecturing on how it's immoral to copy a brain
Ferroday, ScapeApe
"What is a man?!" (shatters wine glass)
gellaho
I think that was so the psychiatrist would feel more comfortable talking to the computer
Then the psychiatrist who was just on his high horse is talking about forcing the computer to answer his questions
Ferroday, ScapeApe
just casually discussing a free will AI like that's not the most complicated fucking thing
Science God Q Alchemy
JD masters might be out if his depth on this one, weirdly
gellaho
Let me tell you, this conversation is long and keeps folding back on itself
Ferroday, ScapeApe
actually how can it have free will if you can install an imperative? you can't have it both ways
Science God Q Alchemy
It might be just padding
gellaho
this is about the fourth time this has been discussed in these 20 pages
gellaho
I like the implication that the program is smart because it figured out it doesn't have a body
Science God Q Alchemy
I think I that's something you would notice
sensitive New Age jakesy
This is just the plot of Cyberpunk now
Keanu is taking over his brain, mannnnnn
Ferroday, ScapeApe
it's also a little bit of Peace Walker
gellaho
Keep it in your pants JD
Science God Q Alchemy
Is, is a three way coming up?
sensitive New Age jakesy
Haha classic Steele, sure she’s sad and crying but I bet I can slip it in still
gellaho
He's. Just. Too. Sexually. Powerful.
sensitive New Age jakesy
The human cock! It’s so good!
gellaho
Are you getting it yet?
Ferroday, ScapeApe
that might be the least sexy way to describe sex
there are medical textbooks with more spice
Science God Q Alchemy
God, jd masters, genius, has some fucking issues with women
gellaho
"She's so hot, but she's such a bitch"
Science God Q Alchemy
This is why I call him "incel steele"
gellaho
Holy hell
Ferroday, ScapeApe
oh fuck off
Science God Q Alchemy
Gid, fuck you simon hawke
gellaho
This is a great page
Ferroday, ScapeApe
post-apocalypse but there's still courts, divorces, and restraining orders
Science God Q Alchemy
I assumed he did that to get rid of the wife so he didn't have to deal with her being part of Steele's life
Didn't think she'd be back
gellaho
Is "you didn't have to" Steele's catch phrase now?
Ferroday, ScapeApe
heaven forbid we have a main character be in a committed relationship
"is that is"? I expect better from your editor, JD
Science God Q Alchemy
God, steele is being such a fucking whiner in this one
gellaho
KILLER STEELE
Science God Q Alchemy
Was jd masters, genius, going through a divorce or something?
gellaho
I wish this horseshit family drama would stop
Science God Q Alchemy
Simon hawke can not write real people.
gellaho
If this was the post apocalypse he actually described, those kids would just be dead
sensitive New Age jakesy
Oh for sure this is just Masters narrating his home life now
Ferroday, ScapeApe
so is Steele his first name?
gellaho
Donovan is his first name
Ferroday, ScapeApe
why would his ex-wife refer to him by last name?
I know a lot of divorcees, literally none of them do this
gellaho
That's a great question
Science God Q Alchemy
So like, how is the world still kicking so much in the end times? We've got middle class waspy family drama going on.
gellaho
How would a kid (or anyone for that matter) make it from Boston to New York
there are like a dozen roving street gangs
Ferroday, ScapeApe
I feel like this must take place in the same """post-apocalypse""" as ready player one
gellaho
These kids should be dead
gellaho
Janice is such a great character
Ferroday, ScapeApe
the spacing on those ellipses bothers me more than it should
Science God Q Alchemy
Ready player ones is more realistic, you can reasonably to get that hyper capitalist dystopia level, some countries have ended up there
gellaho
Was the murderous cyborg not enough stakes? Why introduce this
Science God Q Alchemy
padding
Ferroday, ScapeApe
someone's working through some shit
Science God Q Alchemy
Jd masters, genius, is trying to hit his word count.
gellaho
Fuck yes, bring me Ice
sensitive New Age jakesy
Hell yeah, let’s get iced baby
Science God Q Alchemy
Steele wants to fuck ice, like so so badly
Ferroday, ScapeApe
who doesn't? he's the best character
gellaho
This reads goofier than I think was intended
gellaho
I think this is supposed to be frightening, but it's written so weirdly
Science God Q Alchemy
I feel like the pedestrian being a monster and flipping the car is in every Saturday morning cartoon and dumb horror film
gellaho
Ferroday, ScapeApe
wait, what?
gellaho
These are just weird language choices
Science God Q Alchemy
No editir
sensitive New Age jakesy
His writing style is very passive
It’s always like “these things happened”
Use your action verbs Mastere
The Bloodsucker Proxy
Esteban crawls like a worm, crawls like a worm from a bird
Science God Q Alchemy
Passive writing is the first thing they beat out of you in any creative writing class
gellaho
Stalker has just recruited some kind of cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers
Science God Q Alchemy
Hes their god now
gellaho
I guess his zombie screamers weren't enough, so he's also introduced mole people that live in the subway tunnels and eat human flesh
Science God Q Alchemy
So if his partner is this horrifyingly callous, he was probably always kind of a dick right?
gellaho
Lol, the NYPD already found his son
Science God Q Alchemy
Cool, glad that was a meaningful conflict
gellaho
His daughter is still out there, which worries me
Old Man Brendan
The mechanics of this message relay had better pay off in the climax.
gellaho
Bionic eyes don't cry
gellaho
Science God Q Alchemy
I forgot steele physically can't cry
That's, that's just the best
gellaho
They still have access to doctors and sedatives, of course
Science God Q Alchemy
I think at this point we're safe to ignore the apocalypse stuff
sensitive New Age jakesy
God dam child abusing pimps
Did Q write this?
Blink twice if this is the Great Awakening
gellaho
You don't know the half of it
sensitive New Age jakesy
Q!!!!!!!!!!!
Steele: WWG1WGA
The newest installment
Old Man Brendan
BUT the pimp's name was Tim.
gellaho
Why does this keep happening
Science God Q Alchemy
Fuck
That's a weirdly dark turn
Old Man Brendan
...wait a second
that's my street.
gellaho
Then JD decided it was a great idea to list out his literary crimes
Old Man Brendan
Guys, it's a really nice street.
Science God Q Alchemy
the saddest sad trombone
Old Man Brendan
There is practically NO cyborg-on-pimp violence here.
Ferroday, ScapeApe
Idk, empirical evidence indicates otherwise
gellaho
Things are going well for everyone it seems
Old Man Brendan
So the author did the "child gang-raped" storyline and then decided he had better do it a second time to Steele's daughter so readers understand why he'd be angry about it?
Science God Q Alchemy
Had to get the word virile in there
gellaho
I keep getting bamboozled by the promises of these books
The last one promise a buddy cop story and this one promised cyborg on cyborg violence
Old Man Brendan
Natty Bumpo: Texas Cyborg Edition.
gellaho
I FUCKING GET IT JD
Science God Q Alchemy
Stop expecting these books to deliver anything but madness
Oh good this is back
gellaho
Why the fuck is this happening now
Greg Danang Danar Dono
I'm caught up and this is not a very exciting book
gellaho
I'm not interested in your religious discussion, bud. Two pages ago you had child prostitution
Science God Q Alchemy
Oh my god, eye roll
gdc032
Surprise evangelism!
Science God Q Alchemy
"not believing in things is exactly the same as believing in those things'
Old Man Brendan
Everyone does have that one atheist friend though.
Science God Q Alchemy
Steele, coming to pure flix this fall
gellaho
Oh great, he's going to see Steele's friend the Catholic priest
Who is this book supposed to be for
Science God Q Alchemy
Fantastic
sensitive New Age jakesy
Angry girl dads who feel impotent to protect their family from the world around them
Old Man Brendan
Donovan Steele, Program: Can San Francisco's hottest architect keep his boss from discovering he's actually an engrammatic matrix TRYING to do his best to raise a precocious little girl left on his doorstep by a guy named Tim? Thursdays on ABC after Hanging With Mr. Cooper!
Old Man Brendan
Ah, the TAKEN model.
Science God Q Alchemy
I think this book is for people too dumb to get robocop
gellaho
OK, try to follow this. They're doing this pointless religious discussion
gellaho
And then there is the most abrupt turn
Science God Q Alchemy
sad trombone
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Props to masters for just repeatedly swinging and missing at topics he has no chance at hitting
gellaho
The stripper comes out of fucking nowhere
Literary Chimera, Porn Mercenary
What the actual fuck am I being exposed to. I am either too sober, or not sober enough, for this.
Old Man Brendan
Yeah, what a transition
Science God Q Alchemy
I think he just gets bored when there's not a gunfight or tits happening
Old Man Brendan
I honestly thought we were swinging over to her to see what she thought of the whole AI-soul situation.
gellaho
This is whiplash of the highest order
gellaho
It's the magical world of Steele
Old Man Brendan
It's only a gate to hell if you've got the key, Gozer.
gellaho
That might be happening
Science God Q Alchemy
"the gate of hell" definitely something a sane man with a healthy relationship with women would call it
gdc032
Calling a vag the gate of hell is kind of telling on yourself.
Literary Chimera, Porn Mercenary
Is... Is this what a Giant Sloar's true form looks like? Because I was told it was a three-eyed slime Dinosaur, and I feel dreadfully unprepared for the sanity damage this is inflicting.
Science God Q Alchemy
Normally I'd question if it's diagenically the character or the author but this ain't my first rodeo
gellaho
This is another reminder that the author doesn't remember that this is post apocalyptic
He's cold-cocking dudes in strip clubs and staring down the staff but they think he's no threat.
gdc032
I missed the part where everyone gives a priest a pass when they assault someone. A grown man in a strip club, anway.
Science God Q Alchemy
Priests get qualified immunity
Like cops
gellaho
Strong media presence
Old Man Brendan
...flightsuit?
gellaho
your guess is as good as mine
Aw, yeah. Here he is
Science God Q Alchemy
The thirstiest description I've ever read
gellaho
Ice is a fed now
gdc032
I appreciate the precision in the description of his arms.
Science God Q Alchemy
Was the suit taylored to be so tight?
Does ice want everybody to get a look at the gun show?
gellaho
Must be nice
Old Man Brendan
That corner's one of my favorite places on earth, incidentally. Duke Ellington circle. Spectacular golden hour.
No wonder Ice got no complaints.
Science God Q Alchemy
Brendan mcginley trying to convince us new york's not just packed with cyborg on pimp violence
Old Man Brendan
The bio-war happened because libs banned guns, I get ya.
Science God Q Alchemy
On every corner
gdc032
Did the NRA write this section?
Science God Q Alchemy
What are simon hawkes politics?
My guess, bad
Old Man Brendan
He's making a really good case for banning them, though.
When guns are banned for use on living things, living things become guns.
gellaho
I don't like where this is going
Old Man Brendan
Is Rico played by Prince?
Science God Q Alchemy
Twink alert
Old Man Brendan
Because I only made it as far as spike heels before I thought Prince, and then it got Princier.
gellaho
Ugh
sensitive New Age jakesy
He’s really into the kid rape huh
Like any amount is uncomfortable but uhhh. He really lays it on thick
Science God Q Alchemy
Simon hawke us an unwell man
Old Man Brendan
Really weird how the one time this guy gets diction right, it's when a pimp abuses a minor.
gellaho
sensitive New Age jakesy
Write what you know, I guess
gellaho
Uh oh
Old Man Brendan
HA HA HA HA! "Wait, of the Cos Cob Steeles?"
Science God Q Alchemy
Is borodini fucking rico too?
Old Man Brendan
But Steele TOOK DOWN Borodini with Ice's help in the smash follow-up RIVETING STEELE.
gellaho
The tone is all over the place
Old Man Brendan
...bushy at work?
Later that week, Higgins sent Stone an email confessing to how close he felt they had grown working in the lab. The threat to her career, though never directly stated, was as pathetically awkward as Higgins himself.
gellaho
I don't know why there needs to be another scientist to look at this copy of Steele's brain
Old Man Brendan
Because this is a love interest in a lab coat.
gellaho
Out of nowhere sex scene with the new lady scientist and the project director? Absolutely
gellaho
Pervy Steele program? Why not
Old Man Brendan
This...actually kind of tracks to redheads of my acquaintance.
So the implication is that Steele would also be a voyeur for his colleagues.
sensitive New Age jakesy
Steele loves watching
But the real news is mutha fuckin’ Borodini is back, baby
gellaho
Well, I just got through a page that described four different rapes
Old Man Brendan
"Steele's penis, though still all man, was as rigid as his name. God, it turned him on to watch his coworkers bone. It was probably why he wasn't home enough to realize his 15-year-old daughter was constantly being victimized by the worst people in the worl--NO! No time to think of that now. Higgins's untailored dress shirt was riding up, revealing the cottage-cheese ass of a middle-aged man badunking way above his league."
...in a ROW?
gellaho
They were flashbacks, but I don't know why he had to rapid fire them out
Old Man Brendan
Probably so they didn't glut the ones yet to come?
gellaho
This is the first one. I feel like "Rico was a real twist" is such a bizarre way to end that
Old Man Brendan
That no-goodnik is going to draw quite the comeuppance from Steele over his shenanigans.
sensitive New Age jakesy
“What a galoot! So where was I? Right, the raping. God I love that rapin’”
gellaho
Meanwhile, Stalker has started attacking the gangs
even though he said he was going to take down the cops
Old Man Brendan
IS it possible that Hawkes just thinks Rico would "rap" at them because he's "street"?
We've got CHUDs!
Greg Danang Danar Dono
"Tunnel dwellers."
sensitive New Age jakesy
Yeah that sound like he means it to be racist somehow
gellaho
Yeah, he already had screamers as a zombie-type thing, but whatever
Old Man Brendan
Damn Cornish miners.
gellaho
Meanwhile, Ice is out here getting work done
Actually trying to find Steele's daughter for him
Old Man Brendan
But the rifles were the first ones banned. Are we to believe the entire Bio-War was fought for naught?
gellaho
Ice is much more efficient
sensitive New Age jakesy
Ice is the real hero
gellaho
He's so much better at this
Old Man Brendan
I feel I could write down 10 lines I think Ice says in the book and be correct about 7 of them.
gellaho
Victor Borodini is in hiding
gellaho
And Rico is dead. Glad there was all that rape description for this dude to die as soon as he delivered Steele's daughter
Old Man Brendan
five large is five thousand, Paulie, you knucklehead.
I'd say Rick's so ruthless nobody would do business with him to lose their money and life, but...Trump still has about a thousand petty millionaires fooled so...
gellaho
Steele physiology update: he can't get drunk
Dr Skin, the dandy
Thank fuck I'm caught up.
Old Man Brendan
I hate every character in this book except for that scientist who wandered in from a porn premise.
gellaho
Speaking of, that 30-something who spontaneously decided to fuck the director was a virgin
Old Man Brendan
Wedding Crashers did this scene better. Ben Shapiro did it worse.
Science God Q Alchemy
I mean, at 30 you're just looking any way to get rid of your virginity
gellaho
It's amazing how much of this book that isn't rape is just CW-level relationship and family drama
Dr Skin, the dandy
This whole story is Simon hawkes maribu stork nightmare
gellaho
And Ice kicking ass
Old Man Brendan
It's amazing how every female character is defined by her sexual status.
gellaho
JD really wants me to be invested in the relationship between this new lady doctor and Higgins, the CIA director who wants to install security cameras in everyone's homes
Dr Skin, the dandy
The author wants raped virgins and children to avenge.
Science God Q Alchemy
Higgins is a pervert, guarantee.
Old Man Brendan
The irony is that Higgins is the first victim of the AI perv cameras.
@gellaho Lady Doctor is a sexist term. Please use Doctoresstrix.
Dr Skin, the dandy
"The project is a success!" Immediately fucks old scientist on table without foreplay. I deem this plausible.
gellaho
You have to be shitting me
I get it
This is like the 30th time he's described how these fucking cyber brains work
Dr Skin, the dandy
So the cyborg is schizophrenic
They Jurassic parked his brain.
Science God Q Alchemy
I seriously think a judicious editor could turn these 3 books into one, maybe 2
Old Man Brendan
Did you guys hear the one about the Bio-War vet whose son was in the hospital? The doctor's like, "I can't operate on this idiot. This is my son." HOW?
The answer is in the future, women can be doctors if they thank their superiors for career advancement with sex.
Dr Skin, the dandy
I think Simon Hawkes conversation with his editor ran the complete opposite direction
gellaho
It's good to explain your villian's motivation as late as possible
Old Man Brendan
We've got a Barry!
Dr Skin, the dandy
Stalker is so boring.
gellaho
I like that his rage is caused by a sitcom-esque misunderstanding
Dr Skin, the dandy
I want to hear more about ice's lats.
Old Man Brendan
His waist is actually quite slim.
Dr Skin, the dandy
He was drawn by the minds at Malibu comics.
Science God Q Alchemy
Ice, the world's most fuckable man
gellaho
Everyone is after this kid now
I wanted robo-violence
Dr Skin, the dandy
Anybody else bothered this cyborg was built by like two guys.
Old Man Brendan
I love that Stalker's basically as capable as anyone who visited Radio Shack in 2009.
He's got Facebook's face ID algo and a cheap radio scanner.
Dr Skin, the dandy
He has both broadcast, and receiver capabilities
Let's see it he ever really needs his "radio broadcast" superpower
gellaho
Still on dial-up
Old Man Brendan
Hahaha, he's a phreaker.
gellaho
He got one thing right about the future
Dr Skin, the dandy
You know the noise when you accidentally call a fax machine?
Old Man Brendan
You could do the same thing by whistling with perfect pitch, no lie.
Which side will you guys be on in the Bio-War?
Science God Q Alchemy
They still have phone lines?
Dr Skin, the dandy
The tunnel dwellers. They really must have started out pessimistic.
Old Man Brendan
I'm thinking Screamers. The Tunnel Dwellers are a bit gauche for my tastes and the Skulls are lame since BORING-dini took over.
gellaho
Fuck yeah, car phone
Dr Skin, the dandy
"my car is slowly reversing while I make this call, it confuses the shit out of the NSA"
Science God Q Alchemy
God, just had his pulse on the bleeding edge of technology
gdc032
I bet Steele has an awesome pager.
Old Man Brendan
The police can't triangulate you if you drive in circles.
gellaho
"boffed"
Science God Q Alchemy
Gross
gellaho
that's a fun word to use for rape
Science God Q Alchemy
There is so much rape in these books
JUST. SO. MUCH.
gellaho
That first book was very misleading
Dev is losing it
Old Man Brendan
Borodini's leadership style is to explain performance issues and hierarchal structure, teaching his team to think through outcomes for efficient actions.
Science God Q Alchemy
Is there this much rape in suman hawkes star trek books do you think?
Old Man Brendan
Even women can be affected by guilt!
Why's Dev all stressed? Just the work at Project Download?
Science God Q Alchemy
God this asshole
This character sucks why is here?
gellaho
There's another copy of Steele's brain now
Old Man Brendan
So we have two Matrix steeles and one meat Steele?
Plus Stalker.
Dr Skin, the dandy
Steele Skynet is about to come online
Science God Q Alchemy
There's gonna be an army of Steeles like in that resident evil movie
Old Man Brendan
And the Jurassic Park chimera?
Dr Skin, the dandy
The digital steels will download themselves to stalker resolving his schizophrenia
Science God Q Alchemy
They should combine all the minds into a super steele
Dr Skin, the dandy
But they will not have a cock, this will show their inferiority to steele
Old Man Brendan
it would be so funny if Stalker finally found Steele, only to get an OS update right before he draws on him.
gellaho
Steele's brain is giving the psychiatrist therapy now
Dr Skin, the dandy
This is my ending prediction
Old Man Brendan
What's new in the Steele Fall Creators Update? You can now take notes on rape you witness, and Project Download will automatically transcribe to text for Hawke's readers.
Science God Q Alchemy
Why is this steele nice?
gellaho
Good night, sweet prince
Ferroday, ScapeApe
no dick
Old Man Brendan
This Steele was engrammed prior to his two kids' lives absolutely being ruined
Wait no, I like Ferroday's explanation better.
Steele meat parties are so much fun.
Dr Skin, the dandy
#SHIT
#SHIT
#SHIT
............
#WHERE IS MY DICK? ERROR
gellaho
I think program Steele might be escaping to the world wide web
Science God Q Alchemy
Oh God know
Old Man Brendan
{if Dev == asleep;
run 'shit';
Repeat check 0:02}
gellaho
or Lawnmower-manning
Old Man Brendan
That's bad news because Dev's a nerd who owns a 28800bps modem
Steele will be fully uploaded before Bio-War II
gellaho
Old Man Brendan
The Chingo social hierarchy, though complex, is shitty at a glance.
Science God Q Alchemy
Is chingo a racial slur? It sounds vaguely racist
Dr Skin, the dandy
The Chingos, a diverse ethnic group, of erm Hispanics and nobody else
Ferroday, ScapeApe
chingo is spanish for shit
Old Man Brendan
The actual SoHo hierarchy is Swedish tourists on shopping holiday and a diverse mixture of kids standing in line wearing Supreme gear to buy more Supreme gear.
Science God Q Alchemy
Simon hawke has wanted to say the n word many times in his life
Dr Skin, the dandy
I'm not crediting the author with knowing that
gellaho
Apparently they've decided to house son-fucker Victor Borodini
gellaho
And typed it at least once
Ferroday, ScapeApe
wait, Chingo apparently means a lot?
google translate why do you do this to me
Old Man Brendan
Of course Hawke isn't an Oxford comma enthusiast.
Dr Skin, the dandy
Oh yeah, the author threw that into the last book didn't he. What a wildly bad decision.
Science God Q Alchemy
These books are just a series of bad decisions
Old Man Brendan
SoHo's where the first CHUD movie takes place, so I expect some goddamn tunnel dwellers.
gellaho
Note the use of the word "delicious"
Dr Skin, the dandy
I like how the tunnel dwellers resorted to cannibalism while there are still functioning police forces, strip bars and utilities
Ferroday, ScapeApe
I get the feeling Masters really wanted to write a comic book but couldn't convince an artist to help
Dr Skin, the dandy
Can you imagine.
gellaho
Stop. Saying. Daddy.
Dr Skin, the dandy
Borodini is a bastard
gellaho
The chud-ening
Old Man Brendan
there was a SECOND son?
gellaho
Now we get a Hardy Boys-esque removal of danger
gellaho
There were three. The pedophile son died in the last one. Then there was Rick the middle son, who is just competent. And the youngest twink son, who Victor Borodini was fucking
Old Man Brendan
....his own son?
gellaho
ahuh
Old Man Brendan
Good lord.
gellaho
For old time's sake
Science God Q Alchemy
the fact these got published gives me hope for my own terrible novels
gellaho
Steele's daughter is actively trying to get murdered
Science God Q Alchemy
Ravens just kind of disappeared into the background, hasn't she
steele kind of has too
gellaho
Something might happen now
gellaho
She literally hasn't left the apartment
And talks like a suburban mom
Science God Q Alchemy
well as long as she doesn't do anything catastrophically dumb she'll be safe
gellaho
A couple of chapters ago Steele was going into the sewers to find Stalker
That never actually happened
He just commandeered a car from the people Borodini sent to tail him
Science God Q Alchemy
these three books could have been one book i swear
just cut out all the pointless shit
gellaho
You were saying?
Science God Q Alchemy
oh she's so fucked
gellaho
They're also letting Steele's son come with them
Science God Q Alchemy
I really went out on a limb with that earlier comment, glad it panned out.
gellaho
Ice is knocking people out for no reason now
gellaho
Science God Q Alchemy
Ice is a loose canon
this is the fifth time he's done this
he's knows scotts not gonna shoot him
scotts a fucking little bitch
gellaho
I think the two copies of Steele's brain are fucking
Greg Danang Danar Dono
He gets complete access to the dial-up internet and gains the power to fuck around with traffic lights
Science God Q Alchemy
Why did this dumb joke turn out to be what happens in the book?
gellaho
They're definitely perving out
Science God Q Alchemy
maybe check for cameras in the secure facility you're fucking in
gellaho
Cory is having a hard time
Science God Q Alchemy
I meant this one
Two Ak-47s? jesus steele is fucked.
gellaho
A lot of the end of this book seems to be settling up the next one
Science God Q Alchemy
jesus, these books are like the fucking marvel movies
gellaho
And not resolving this one
Science God Q Alchemy
just all set up to the next one
there is not enough that he needed four books for this story
gellaho
Ice just used his special move on Steele's son
Science God Q Alchemy
Ice is so cool, ice should have his own book
just cut out all the cyborg stuff, just have ice solve crimes and fuck
sensitive New Age jakesy
So the next book is going to be Steele vs Computer Steele
I should have known the only man who could take down Steele is Steele himself
Science God Q Alchemy
why isn't that resolved in this book? it is in no way meaty enough for two books.
gellaho
Why stop now?
The Bloodsucker Proxy
The only thing that can stop a bad Steele with a gun is a good Steele with a gun
Science God Q Alchemy
these books are nothing but cliches and rape, held together with world building a five year old would come up with.
a demented five year old
The Bloodsucker Proxy
I've seen five year olds come up with better stories than this, I've read Axe Cop
gellaho
Ice is the only one to have done anything
Science God Q Alchemy
Ah, it's great when the heroes gun fleeing enemies down in the back
gellaho
Turns out the cover of this book is incorrect. The cyborg looks like Mick not a mannequin
Science God Q Alchemy
the cover is symbolic
gellaho
Oh, God. He's trying to talk him down
Science God Q Alchemy
he makes a compelling point, he did say come alone
Raven just completely disregarded that
Greg Danang Danar Dono
I hope every conflict in this series continues to be solved by Ice clocking people
gellaho
An entire police squad also showed up
Greg Danang Danar Dono
All punching the rogue Steele AI in the computer brain
Science God Q Alchemy
If he doesn't kill Cory he'll never have any credibility in the future
they'll all know he's a welcher
he'll know he's a welcher
gellaho
We got a bunch of geniuses here
gellaho
Ice saving the day again
gellaho
This might explain why Steele's face keeps changing
gellaho
"Steel Justice."
Science God Q Alchemy
they let this man be a professional writer
gellaho
These robots have an awful lot of blood
Science God Q Alchemy
they gave the cyborgs extra blood for climactic battles
gellaho
Here's how Steele wins: head kick
gellaho
Then, head punches
gellaho
I guess the daughter died
gellaho
Steele's going to lose all his sad memories
gellaho
And the sequel setup
gellaho
The End.
I guess that daughter only existed to get raped and murdered, so that's fun
Greg Danang Danar Dono
Whee!
And you censored some of the rape for us?
Jesus
gellaho
Science God Q Alchemy
wow, these just keep getting worse huh?
gellaho
Everyone is just miserable and/or horrible
Science God Q Alchemy
You've committed yourself to finishing them, you're now trapped in a hell of your own making
gellaho
This doesn't seem to have anything to do with program Steele
Science God Q Alchemy
I hope there's less rape in this one
gellaho
that would be pretty great
Greg Danang Danar Dono
I am pretty sold on this one
sensitive New Age jakesy
I know I keep bringing this up but this is almost the exact story from Cyberpunk
