96: Surprise Party Nicole Davidson

FancyShark

In front of you

gellaho

Very funny, what's his actual name

FancyShark

Meanwhile, Tony's family is being cut apart with a rusty cleaver by his boss

Brendan

"This is my wife, who killed my cousin."

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

Dr Klingfeldt is what a perfert with no morals would call himself as he goes around offering free mammograms.

Sex Bologna Flippant Sausage

"Hahahah, I got you. Its really Mengele."

Brendan

His name was Mercutio.

gellaho

The book ends with Maureen insulting her bewheelchaired brother. And turkey

gellaho

But first

Brendan

"Ese fookin' Germans, I sez."

Katie was great.

RIP Katie, you made Marshall pop as a character.

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

Yeah, no notes for Katie, she did a great job. You get a milk bone.

Sex Bologna Flippant Sausage

Ew sauerkraut.

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

Nicole, on the other hand

Brendan

My dog just stops me from writing, the little tennis ball crackhead that heis.

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

If that's her real name

Brendan

Sometimes your dog's a Chris. Sometimes a Tony.

gellaho

Hmmm

FancyShark

Imagine getting taught writing by Kathryn

gellaho

Hmmmmmmm

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

Oh no

wait, "winterkill" and "demon's beach"?

Brendan

You know I'm something of a po' man myself.

It's highly suspenseful!

gellaho

Hmmmmmmm

Sex Bologna Flippant Sausage

I dont like where this is going.

Ramb$ne

(AND ALIVE!)

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

GIF

FancyShark

We read Demon's Beach. It sucked ass.

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

Didn't quite beat the law of averages, did she

gellaho

Same book in every advertisement, very strange

Ramb$ne

did she write anything on the steele level?

or is this all just some Doona stuff

FancyShark

It's Doona without the interesting setting

Ramb$ne

i mean, i realize we're in the year of pain for a specific reason lol

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

It's not my fault if that's what we're insinuating

FancyShark

Picture an after-school special that was labeled a horror story and that's Kathryn/Nicole's whole library

gellaho

And yet, it was probably the best one

We have defeated Surprise Party

FancyShark

We did it!

Exemplary riffing tonight, everyone!

Thank you, @gellaho !

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

THERE WAS NO MASK

BOOOO

BOOO KATHRYN

Excellent garbage, gellaho, thanks once again

gellaho

So concludes the 96th Edition of the Book Cage

gellaho

May all your ferris wheels be of dizzying speed

FancyShark

Have a great night, everyone!

Brendan

I have only love for this author. She comes from a more innocent time.

Who are we to fault her for writing stories about virtuous maidens and bad boys turned good, where all's well that ends well? We, who stand on the precipice of hell and judge her for skipping to heaven? I say, let us die as men and kings. Let us sacrifice our blood to wind back time, in the forbidden scrolls, and see her vision realized.

Let our sacrifice ring out in the halls of Never, for it shall be a finer world.

gellaho

I bet you'd love to give her money for her writing consultancy

Only $375

Brendan

What can she teach me that I don't already know? I live closer to the same boardwalk and was an actual teen at the time of this writing.

Plus I'm Italian.

And I've poisoned children.

The coke-smuggling plots basically write themselves.

Badger, Gun-Tutting Cardinal

The total package!

Mordred, Nuclear Werewoof ☢🐺

Completely and utterly missed out on Book Cage this week. 🥲